The Pursuit of Heaven
The concept of wasted love is a false one. There’s no such thing. Even if misguided or directed toward the wrong person or people, love is the chief duty of our species. It lingers for eternity. It is the lifeline that enables our survival. Perhaps it’s the only thing worth pursuing.
I find myself in a quarter-life crisis. It’s not existential, but one of impatience. It has to do with the waning of my youth, heartache, and what comes next. It’s obvious what must be done, but opportunity is required. Last week I returned to Chicago from Los Angeles. Unfortunately, my pre-conceived prospect of a relocation stipend to work on the West Coast was a false one. This project was unlike the previous campaigns in this regard. All of my savings are gone, due to a failure in communication. Therefore, I must start from scratch and intensify newsroom applications. The situation is dire. Because of this, I’ve come to a series of rude awakenings.
This was my first weekend back in Chicago. Although truly happy to once again see lifelong friends, the entire time wasn’t anywhere near as enthralling as my most boring weekend in L.A. Most people in my circle are established, in relationships or getting married. I’m constantly a third wheel. Every night I come home alone, empty, and $100 poorer than I was earlier in the evening. It’s pointless to continue going out every weekend thinking it will…
